You should preferably be together, 24 hours per day, for the first 2 weeks. The first day you should engage is a lot of sexual activity, to release pent-up sexual energy into your brain. You should not have sex that day.

A test of whether things are going to be ok is whether you both make sacrifices for the other's happiness. Another test is if, when you argue, you quickly make up.

Although these are tests, they are also what each of you should do to make the marriage successful. The man making a sacrifice encourages the woman to do the same. This makes each person grateful to the other, as it should be. But, you should both stand your ground over things that are important to you, even though this creates unhappiness. However, you should both, after a little while, make-up and forget about such arguments. Arguments about important matters are natural in marriage until the woman decides to become the wife of the husband (by surrendering her body, heart and self to him).

When you fall in love, and when you have huge desire for each other, then you should have unprotected sex, not before. You should not allow another to satisfy you sexually on more than two occassions prior to marriage, because it increases the chances of falling in love. If your partner is not prepared to commit to you, you should not risk falling in love with him or her. You should find satisfaction elsewhere.

In some cases, one partner has committed to the other, but the other has not. Marriage is too important to wait. The partner should feel free to find another person to marry.

Caring, being tender and friendship are the foundation of marriage. Each person will probably find that the other is not caring for him/her, not being gentle or not providing a need in some way or other. You should find a way to explain to the other about this. For example, you can take a specific incident that you are dissatisfied with, write about it and ask your spouse to reply in writing. Finally, you reply and then leave it at that. Then give him or her to do exactly the same thing about you. Writing is best so that there is no misunderstanding.

One idea is for you to divide up days between days when your spouse will try and make you happy, and days when you will try and make him or her happy. After the actual time of marriage, however, both of you should try and make the other happy.

If he or she does not try and make you happy, you should accept this as your fate. Marriage should continue for as long as both of you care for the other. You should both avoid threatening the other with leaving them, unless you genuinely believe that your partner does not care for you. If you have a problem, you should try and sort out the problem together. Often, the woman identifies 'problems' and has 'worries'. It is useful to write these down and for the man to think whether these are real problems or not, and to write down a short answer 'yes' or 'no' as to whether he sees the problem or worry as real. This may well help the woman to understand that there are fewer problems than she thinks, and that her husband is taking her concerns seriously.

From time to time, the couple will have arguments or be causing each other mental or other pain. They should have a code word like 'finish' or 'enough' to indicate to each other that the time has come to put a definite stop to the pain.

One needs to learn to live moment to moment, forgetting about past issues and not unduly worrying about the future. Worry does not help solve problems, only discussion and thinking between you will do that. You should talk together, but not for so long that you go over the same ground or get tired. When talking your minds should be fresh.

Sometimes, especially women, think that the husband does not understand them. You should try and slowly discuss the important things that are the subject of such lack of possible understanding, and also explain to the woman that unimportant things do not matter if there is lack of understanding.

Arguing creates stress which in turn creates illness. When one partner wants to argue, the other partner should listen for a few minutes. But if the argument is getting silly or counterproductive, you should keep quiet, say 'peace' and nothing else until the next activity like lunch or going to bed takes place and then kiss and make-up, say you are sorry.

The man's first responsibility is to his son, then to his wife. He should decide how to bring up his son, with input from the wife. Similarly, the wife has first responsibility to bring up the daughter.

Life is about happiness and love not money. Neither the man nor the woman should work too hard. Rather, they should try and maximise their time together, and make do with less money.

In general, the married couple should not tell each other what to do. They should learn to trust each other to do what is best. Importantly, both persons should recognise that essentially each is free to do as he or she likes. You need to learn to listen to each other.

It is a good idea to try and say 'yes' to each other. However, this should not be one-sided. If one person always says 'no' or 'but' or does the opposite of what the other suggests, the other should do the same.

Sexual activity is important for the marriage to succeed, for happiness and for the man's religious development. It is best in marriage if each person tries their utmost to satisfy the other's needs. If they do not they should try and come to some arrangement whereby each person can obtain their sexual satisfaction, specifically orgasms, through other means, whilst preserving the marriage. This does not include the man penetrating another woman or the woman being penetrated.

Stress in the early part of a marriage is not bad. It brings the two people together when the differences are narrowed through discussion and compromise and as arguments are one by one dealt with.